FRIENDSHIP
It was during a phone conversation with a person who I 'd known for over 30 years that I considered to be "a friend" during a debate we were having concerning a mutual friend, when he blurted out "Shelle I'm not your friend!!! Granted... it had been awhile since we had talked or even seen one another but it was just me who over the years assumed that since we'd shared lots of secrets;early on had one chance encounter with sex, but the relationship remained platonic. Which led me to assume all these years it was safe to refer to him as "my friend." It hurt me so bad that in the moment, I just hung up the phone on him. Blocked him on social media, and deleted his number from my contacts. To some that might seem extreme, but for me it was a shock! How did I misjudge who I thought was friend, he wasn't an enemy I knew too much about his life to call him an acquaintance; or Was I just that lame?
Definition of friend1a: one attached to another by affection or esteemShe's my best friend.b: ACQUAINTANCE2a: one that is not hostileIs he a friend or an enemy?b: one that is of the same nation, party, or groupshowbiz friends3: one that favors or promotes something (such as a charity)this trend has alarmed friends of the liberal arts— Raymond WaltersThe friends of the library will host a fund-raiser.4: a favored companion5capitalized : a member of a Christian sect that stresses Inner Light, rejects sacraments and an ordained ministry, and opposes war
— called also Quaker
What's the difference between friends and acquaintances?
People often distinguish between an acquaintance and a friend, holding that the former should be used primarily to refer to someone with whom one is not especially close. Many of the earliest uses of acquaintance were in fact in reference to a person with whom one was very close, but the word is now generally reserved for those who are known only slightly.
Acquaintance is often found paired with nodding. Although nodding acquaintance sounds like it describes a person who is known just enough to nod at, it tends to be used instead to refer to a thing or field with which one has a small amount of knowledge or familiarity (and this is the meaning that the phrase has had since its introduction to the language in the early 19th century).
It made me re-examine many of the folks in my circle of love maybe, my feelings were hurt because it was a hidden truth about me GOD was about to reveal. I remember another friend who told me many years ago that I looked at the world through rose colored glasses, chasing rainbows. That was in 1987, being young and fine I laughed at that notion because I always prided myself as being on top of everything and very well read on all subjects; topics, and all the latest fashions. It must be some truth to the saying "Ignorance is bliss," so I been told, but my firsthand knowledge is even one better.
Years, passed away since my friend spoke those words and that friend had long died too, so I never had the opportunity to tell them how right they were about my false perspective on life in general. It took some years for me see clearer after being betrayed by both male and female friends, used, and verbally & emotionally abused with intimate friends to snap out of it and remove those rose colored lenses while going through the storms of life. I realized that there was not just one individual but many who had watched me go through that journey, not many who stuck by me during those times.
Long before the internet, social media networks, and contacts were a thing I use to surround myself with lots and lots of people I called them "friends" throwing wild birthday bashes at the club, cook outs spending lots of money on me and my female posse. We'd be glammed up and turn those parties out. Traveling. During those days, money was never an issue needless to say friends were plentiful with a few to spare, but when I got into trouble financially and had to go to my grandmother for counsel and support she asked me "where are all those friends at now?" Good question, that I had no prepared answer. Of course that's when she gave me the best advice ever to this day I still rely heavily on her words people will come and go but the one person, place or thing that's always consistence is GOD!
Grandma said simply..."TRUST GOD"...
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